


bubblegum

by losersclub



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Self-Harm, alois is traumatized and unstable, ciel is scared and hiding behind a mask
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2018-02-22
Packaged: 2019-01-15 21:23:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12329151
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/losersclub/pseuds/losersclub
Summary: Alois kept chewing vigorously, looking as if he was concentrating harder than need be to chew gum. Suddenly, he stopped, letting out a loud gulp noise."It will stick to your ribs, you know?" Asked Ciel (sounding more like a statement than a question), not looking up from his book."Oh, bullshit! So, whatcha readin'?"A love story filled with spiders and tea meetings.





	1. beautiful blue

**Author's Note:**

> hi!  
> this may sound harsh, but this fic is not for people who think these characters are cinnamon rolls. this is not a fic for people who think alois is a 'uwu bipolar blonde baby whos a slut'. this goes deeper, and gets dark. please be thoughtful about commenting too, as i really don't want to hear people fangirling over the harsh realities these boys have to face. thank you!  
> i'd like to note that alois has a deep love for claude. i do NOT support pedophilia, nor do i support a relationship between them. it is one sided, as claude does not care for alois, only for his soul.  
> anyways, this is my first cielois fic, i've only written ciel once before, so please forgive me if he's a bit OOC!  
> p.s. this is a modern AU, so they have phones, cars, etc.

A short boy with a solemn expression and the cutest face Alois had ever laid eyes on wandered his way into Tim Horton's one day, not knowing what was awaiting him.

Alois chewed his gum thoughtfully.

Alois, for one, was not the type to keep comments about others to himself. Usually he had small outbursts with things like "Your breath smells like pig fart" or "Are you sure you're wearing eyeshadow? It honestly looks like you have a black eye, ma'am.", earning him a bad reputation. Not that Alois gave any fucks about his reputation.

So, upon seeing this boy, he emitted a gasp. Claude, who had been sitting across the table, subtly prepared himself to excuse Alois' actions.

"Hey!! You're so fuckin' adorable!"

A few mothers gave him a dirty look, but it was to be expected.

The boy looked up from the ground, directing a one-eyed gaze towards the blonde, scoffing. "Are you... serious?"

Alois took this in the wrong way, thinking the boy with the cute face was embarrassed. Alois giggled, pushing himself up from the table and dancing over to the boy. He leaned down a little, getting eye level with the solemn boy.

"Of course! You're such a cutie! Damn, I would give anything to be as pure as you!"

The boy seemed to take great offence to this comment, but said nothing, pushing past Alois and sitting as far away from Alois and Claude's table as possible.

Despite his best efforts, Claude could not suppress a small amount of laughter.

Alois would not give up so easily. He pouted for a second, thinking, and then launched his plan of attack.

Strutting over to the boy, Alois heard the shop door jingle again. A tall man with dark hair and red eyes purposefully made his way towards the table they were at.

"Have you made a friend, Ciel?" The man asked, a smile playing on his lips.

The short boy, who seemed to be named Ciel, rolled his eyes.

_Or is it eye? That's such a mysterious eyepatch._ Alois thought to himself, chewing on his bubblegum all the same.

"Ciel?! What a pretty name!" The words busted out of Alois' mouth before he could think about it. Not that he ever did think about his words.

Ciel gave him a cold look,"Your nonsensical comments are giving me a headache."

Alois cocked his head, thinking about it. "Don't scrunch up your face so much, it might just get stuck that way."

 Ciel could have sworn he heard a sinister undertone, and took no time to fire back,"Are you threatening me? Do you even know who I am?"

_What kind of question is that, Ciel? He didn't know your name, how would he have known you?_ Ciel mentally slapped himself.

Alois stuck his tongue out, but not giving up on talking to Ciel. He was a persistent boy, and had no trouble wasting his time on trivial things. Pursuing a likely heterosexual boy, for example. As troubling as this thought was, Alois dismissed it with a physical wave of his hand.

"Oh come on! What's your number, Ciel? Here, give me your phone!" Alois snatched the phone out of Ciel's jacket pocket, provoking three sounds of protest.

One from Ciel, who looked shocked and angry. One from the man who seemed to be Ciel's butler, who immediately smacked the phone out of Alois' hand. The final from Claude, who narrowed his eyebrows and strutted over.

"Do you think that gave you permission to touch my young master?" Claude asked, as tears sprung in the corners of Alois' eyes.

Ciel scoffed internally, closing his eyes and pressing a finger to his temple.  _Crocodile tears._

"Sebastian, leave the matter alone." Ciel sighed, mentally preparing for another outburst from the blonde. Surprisingly, one didn't come.

When Ciel opened his eyes once again, the boy and his butler were gone.

This gave Ciel a lot to think about.

* * *

 When Alois arrived home with Claude, he was unbelievably angry.

He was stuck in a cycle of crying and screaming out of anger the entire ride home, providing Claude a big job to take care of him.

But it only got worse when they arrived back to the estate, Alois throwing a fit and switching moods quickly. He screamed, he cried, he broke things. Nothing the servants did could ease this rage. Alois ended up punching Hannah square in the throat, even beginning to claw at it. That's when Claude believed he needed to step in.

Claude cleared his throat. "Your highness."

Alois whipped around to look at the tall man. "C-Claude..." The blonde choked out, immediately releasing Hannah.

The maid held her throat, sobbing silently. She backed away from the young man, her legs collapsing beneath her.

"Let's go for a walk in the gardens, shall we?"

Tears fell from Alois' eyes, and he dashed over to Claude, taking a hold of his hand and immediately cracking a half smile.

 


	2. a walk in the gardens

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey! sorry for the delay! we should have regular updates from here on out!

Hand in hand, Claude and Alois were wandering through the gardens.

"Say, Claude. You're awfully quiet~ Cat got your tongue?" Alois asked in a sing-song tone, but there were ominous undertones.

Claude said nothing, continuing to lead Alois around the gardens. He wasn't one for too many words, but Alois definitely took this in the wrong way.

"Claude! Answer me!" The blonde tightened his grip on his butler's hand, abruptly stopping.

Claude shifted his gaze to Alois, suppressing a deep sigh. "Master, with all due respect, don't you think that your actions are a tad-"

_Smack._

Alois had slapped his butler across the face, his face turning red with anger. Sinking to his knees, the boy buried his face in his hands.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." he muttered, but when Claude didn't answer, the boys pleas got louder,"I'M SORRY, CLAUDE! FORGIVE ME!"

Claude bent down, putting a gloved hand in Alois' slightly fluffy hair. "Yes, your highness."

This seemed to stir something in Alois. Gently pulling his face out of his hands, he grabbed a hold of Claude and pulled himself closer to the butler. A hug, of sorts. Of course, Claude was not expecting this, and failed to hug back as the blonde boy cried into his vest.

"Why, Claude... Why don't you care about me... I..." Trailing off, Alois just sobbed into Claude.

Eventually, the boys breathing slowed and his grip lessened. He had fallen asleep. Claude was slightly irritated, but sighed and picked Alois up, bringing him to his room.

* * *

 Ciel picked at his cake, mind somewhere far from 'working on important things for the company'. He brought a small forkful up to his face, but dropped it back onto the plate.

He couldn't seem to get what happened earlier out of his head. Why was that boy acting that way? Ciel had forgotten, or maybe didn't even catch the blonde's name.

"Young master, is something the matter?" Sebastian knew exactly what was on Ciel's mind; he knew his young master well.

"No," came the simple answer,"go away."

Sebastian gave a nod of acknowledgement, leaving the room in which Ciel typically did his work in.

Ciel sighed, pushing the plate away from him, picking up his pen and staring blankly at the papers that had been presented to him. He didn't know what was going on. Strange things happened to him constantly, but he couldn't shake the venomous tones that the blonde had in his lilting voice. The ice blue eyes were full of something, but Ciel couldn't place it.

"Dammit!" Ciel muttered, standing from his desk. He proceeded to pace his study, eyes trained on the floor.

* * *

 

Alois' eyes shot open, and he emitted a loud scream. Tangling himself in his blanket, he let the tears stream from his eyes. Yelling for Claude, the boy felt the panic start to fade, and get replaced with anger. Claude opened the door quietly, speed walking to Alois' bedside.

"Claude! Why are you so late? Am I that low priority?"

Claude shook his head,"I was taking care of Hannah's neck. My apologies, master."

Alois offered a bitter smile,"So, today is a therapy day, isn't it?"

Claude nodded, and started to lay out clothes on the end of Alois' bed, humming quietly.

Alois wiped the tears from his eyes and stretched his arms up to the sky, then forwards. He took a deep breath, pulling the blanket off and swinging his legs towards Claude.

Claude immediately started helping the boy dress, staying silent.

"You make me angry. I want to know what goes on in your mind, Claude." Alois stated, as if he was commenting on the weather.

Claude pushed his glasses up his nose, standing and offering a small bow. "Shall we go to breakfast, your highness?"

Alois rolled his eyes,"You're irritating."

Standing from his bed, Alois followed Claude through the halls, down the stairs, and into the large dining room.

Hannah was standing by the table, looking uncomfortable and nervous. The triplets were in the back of the room, whispering among themselves. Alois' nose twitched in anger as he sat down.

Alois had barely picked at the french toast that had been presented to him, and his gaze shifted to Claude after a few minutes.

"Say, Claude. Get me some bubblegum when we go to therapy." He said simply, standing up.

Claude nodded, and led the blonde towards the door.

"Seeya laaaater, Hannah!" Alois called, not seeming to acknowledge the fear in her eyes.

Alois settled into the passenger seat as Claude turned the keys. Putting his feet on the dash, Alois leaned his seat back. He smirked, knowing it would prompt some kind of response from Claude. Yet, he was so wrong. Claude continued to stay silent, driving steadily along towards the hospital.

"Are you pissy today, Claude? Did my screaming wake you?" Alois was joking, but somewhere deep inside, he knew that he was absolutely terrified of Claude being upset with him.

"No."

"You're really cold, if I didn't know better, I'd say you hate me."

"You know I do not hate you."

"Yeah. I guess."


	3. therapy

"How has your week been going, Alois?"

"How do you think?"

"I don't know, I'm only your therapist. Did Dr. Sutcliff up your dosage of...  Lorazepam, was it?"

Alois sighed, leaning back in his chair. Rolling his ankles a couple of times, he nodded. "Yeah."

"Great. Has it been working for you?" The woman in the chair asked, offering up a smile.

"Its been less than a week, are you incompetent? I wouldn't know."

Alois' therapist sighed. She was used to this kind of behavior from the young male, but it still seemed to be affecting her. There was nothing stopping her from admitting him to the inpatient ward, but it seemed that he would pose a danger to the other children.

"Speaking of Dr. Sutcliff, she's one crazy bitch. God, does she dye her hair with baby's blood or somethin'?" Alois giggled to himself, reveling in the attention he got in his therapy sessions.

Elizabeth ignored this, writing something down in her notes. The young woman was only recently hired as a therapist, and had only been with Alois for about three months. She hadn't really gotten anywhere in their therapy sessions, but was determined to get somewhere.

"Alois, let's talk seriously for a second. How is your relationship with Claude? Last week you said," she hummed for a second, checking her notes,"that you would do anything to know what he's thinking. That you harbored feelings for him, but he 'couldn't give less of a horse shit about you'. Do you still feel this way?"

Alois gritted his teeth. He wanted to lash out, yell, scream, pull his hair out, pull  _her_ hair out, anything. Claude was... important to him. More important than Hannah. More important than those foul triplets.

"It's fine."

"You know you need to be honest if we want to get anywhere."

"God dammit, I don't care! Hannah signed me up for this stupid therapy program, I couldn't care less about this! All I want... all I want... is for Claude to love me..." Alois' eyes quickly pricked with tears, and he didn't bother with wiping them away.

Elizabeth sighed,"Alois, it's unhealthy to have these feelings for an adult. Him loving you... would make him a pedophile. That's not what you wa-"

"SHUT UP!" Alois balled his hands into fists and sprung up, pushing the door open and slamming it behind him.

Making his way to the waiting room, Alois' eyes were blurry with tears. He bumped into someone, and heard a noise of protest.

"Oh shut up, are you a baby or someth-" Ice blue eyes met a singular deep blue pool. "Oh."

"It's you... again." The boy with the ashen hair sighed. "Sebastian, we don't have time for this. Come along now."

Alois cried out in protest,"Wait!"

The other boy and his butler ignored Alois, purposefully walking down the hallway. Continuing on his path to the waiting room, head down, Alois felt himself bump into a warm chest.

Looking up, his eyes filled with delight when he realized who it was- none other than his own butler, Claude Faustus. 

"Claude! You've come to save me..." Alois seemed to bask in Claude's gaze, which was void of emotion.

"Master, you were only there for... not even ten minutes. Did something go wrong?"

Alois ignored him, until he heard footsteps behind him. At that moment, Alois had been pressed against his butlers chest, the false sense of security making him feel at ease.

"Ah, Alois! I found you. Are you leaving for the day?" Elizabeth asked, hoping her worry didn't show through.

Elizabeth was distraught. Alois was technically her responsibility while he was in the session, yet she could never seem to make sense of him, or keep track of him. It was scary, being a therapist with such an unpredictable patient. As unpredictable as the boy was... he was also fragile. Like a butterfly.

"Ah, yes. My master and I will be leaving early; I apologize for any trouble this may cause you." Claude spoke smoothly, in a way that irritated Alois.

On the car ride home, Alois demanded they stop at a convenience store.

"I want my fucking bubblegum." was the only offered explanation.

 There was something in the swift and smooth way Claude answered that always got to Alois. Something in the simple 'yes' or 'no' answers, maybe the 'yes, your highness' or even the way the butler smoothly delivered comments that had hidden venom. It irked the boy to no end, but also was almost... endearing. Sometimes, Alois would sit in his room and stare at the ceiling, trying to determine what was going on in Claude's mind from morning to night. It irritated Alois, not knowing what his butler was thinking.

"Say, Claude. Why do you never express yourself? Wear a fucking flower in your hair, for all I care. Tell me what you're thinking. I can't stand being left in the dark..." Alois' tone quickly declined from curious, to angry, to sad. "You're killing me."

Claude, to Alois' surprise, gave a small chuckle. "I am but a servant; you need not know what your humble servant is thinking."

The reply he got infuriated Alois, to the point where he brought a fist down onto his leg. "Claude, I hate you! I hate you, I hate you! Drop me off at home and never come back."

The tears building in Alois' eyes only aggravated the boy more. Claude, predictably, only nodded. Of course, the demon knew that Alois would call for him again within a matter of hours, minutes, even. Alois was predictable to him, but unpredictable to all else, even Hannah. Alois' soul was desirable, but Claude knew that it wasn't worth all this fuss. If he hadn't been taught better, he would have shattered all of Alois' bones by now.

The boy was a soul to take, nothing more, and nothing less.

A broken soul, a lonely soul.

A soul that clung to every shred of kindness it received.


	4. penny for a thought

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> goodness i hate and love claude <.<;  
> this chapter is very centered on a lot of alois' problems and feelings, and this may just play a role in the future!  
> warning!! this chapter contains self harm towards the end!

Alois was stubborn, and he barely knew what boundaries were. He was so broken, so hurt.

"You're disgusting! Vile demon, leave my sight! All of you! Go rot!"

"Master, I ne-"

"Shut up, Hannah! Shut up, shut up, shut up! Claude. Never come back. I don't fucking need you."

"Yes, your highness."

Alois looked as if his heart had dropped out of his chest, and it probably had. "Wait, Clau-"

He was already gone.

The blonde boys footsteps could be heard throughout the manor, resounding on wooden stairs. Stomping his way to the second floor, Alois' face was wet with tears. He somehow knew that what he had said was not something easily taken back.

Alois threw his door open violently, slamming it closed behind him. The boy let out a frustrated scream, repeatedly kicking things around his room, until his foot hit a small plush doll he had ordered Claude to make for him.

"Ah..." A breathy sound escaped his lips, and he collapsed to his knees.

Picking up the little plush Claude, Alois dug his nails into it unconsciously. Tears hitting the doll and the floor, Alois bowed his head in defeat. Yet, he would not give up. Claude couldn't stay away for long... right?

 Alois did not know what he was to do. It was nearing lunch time, and Hannah's cooking was oh so inferior to Claude's.

Alois jumped slightly at a knock at his door, taking a deep breath before opening it, to Hannah's concerned face. Hannah was always so caring towards him, and yet... he found it infuriating, and he never knew why.

"A-ah! Master, I have prepared lunch for you..." Hannah stuttered a few times, gaze falling onto the hardwood floors.

"I bet it's disgusting." Alois muttered, but followed the maid down the stairs.

Sitting down at the table, Alois pulled his phone out. He knew Claude would typically take it away at meals, and he didn't seem to mind.

Alois picked at his lunch, barely eating. It was impossible to get behind the boys mind completely, especially at times like these, while it is working harder than usual.

Tears spattered the plate as it sunk in completely. Claude was gone. The person Alois depended on would not be easily coaxed back into his arms again.

Alois shot up from his chair, knocking it over. "I'm going to my room. Don't follow me, or I'll have your head."

In reality, Alois was going to do something he'd come to regret.

Slipping into the bathroom, Alois sighed heavily as it locked with a gentle click. Fishing around in the cabinets, Alois pricked his finger on something sharp. It gave him an idea.

"If I hurt myself... Claude will come save me, right?" Alois pondered out loud, unlocking the door hopefully.

It had been months since Alois had taken a blade to his skin, and every time, Claude was there to tend to the wounds.

Hands shaking, tears pattering steadily on the tile, Alois raised the blade to his exposed wrist.

Yet, Claude didn't appear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AH im sorry for the wait! i kept putting this off TT__TT


	5. a strange visitation

Blood dripping from pale flesh, tears flowing freely, Alois Trancy collapsed onto the bathroom floor. He was not unconscious; no, not at all. He was very much present, disturbingly present.

Alois didn't dare close his eyes for more than a brief moment as he waited for his butler to appear. The blonde was painfully aware of the numb sensation in his arm, yet did nothing to quell it.

Suddenly, there was a knock. Gentle, hesitant, yet still discernable through the ringing of Alois' ears. Alois didn't dare move, on the off chance it was Claude. He knew if Claude was coming, he would be there already, but somehow, Alois told himself otherwise.

"Master?" It was Hannah.

Alois didn't have the energy to get up, letting out a deep sigh. He managed a gentle 'go away' which was not nearly as commanding as he had intended.

Hannah gently opened the door, careful not to hit the boy on the floor. She gasped at the sight, immediately digging through a cabinet to find something to stop the bleeding. Coming up with nothing, Hannah settled for toilet paper.

Gently pressing it into the two long, thin lines running up his arm, the maid shook gently. She had a bit of a surprise when Alois said nothing, did nothing. It was if he had been defeated, his attitude soiled. Something she thought she'd never see; even through his fight for Claude's attention.

Alois and Claude were so different, yet Alois seemed to long for that. In some ways, they were the same. Starved for something they may never obtain, although it was more likely for Claude to obtain his goal than Alois.

A soul. A simple, tainted soul.

Nothing seemed to compare to Claude's extreme monotonous nature, until you took a closer look. The way his nostrils flared when Alois made a rude gesture or comment, how his fingers twitched as if they were clasped around a small throat when the boy was dissatisfied(which was quite often, mind you.).

-

At the sound of a knock, Sebastian was quick to open the Phantomhive Manor's doors, to none other than Claude Faustus.

Quirking an eyebrow, the Phantomhive butler straightened up, looking Claude in the eyes with a slightly warning look. Ciel had finally made his way to the door, looking almost disgusted by the sight before him; what kind of butler shows up without his master? Ciel opened his mouth to speak, but Sebastian swiftly interrupted, acting as if that did not happen.

"What brings you here today, Mr. Faustus?" Sebastian asked, his tone nothing short of polite and courteous.

Ciel looked between the two. Did they know each other? Even thinking of the blonde boy he had run into twice now made Ciel feel sick. Why is his butler here without the boy? Ciel felt quite disgusted, yet confused.

"Greetings, Sebastian, Ciel." Claude started, a slight edge to his voice,"Unfortunately, the master and I got into a, how do you say, disagreement, and he does not want me in his sight. I thought I shall take this opportunity to visit the residence of Sir Phantomhive."

Claude could hear Alois' response now, taunting him, haunting him. 'God, aren't you just buttering them up, Siiiiir Claude Faustus?' Claude's eye twitched, and he took a deeper  breath than intended.

"My sincerest apologies, Mr. Faustus, but we cannot have gu-"

"No, Sebastian. Let us see how this plays out, shall we?" Ciel an almost invisible smirk playing over his lips, his blue eye not giving away his intentions.

Claude took a deep bow, face as monotonous as ever, aside from the slight twitch of his right eyebrow.

Sebastian, leading Claude up to a guest room while Ciel finished up some work, had questions. He knew it was inappropriate of a butler to do so, so he kept his mouth shut. Another demon, in his young master's manor? He just despised the thought of it. Although the two demons had not had long conversations, they had previously run into each other on bad terms. Sebastian did not say much, other than the occasional idle chatter, things like 'how are you?', or 'how's Alois?' (which made Claude no less than furious, and Sebastian knew it.).

Upon arriving to an empty guest room, Sebastian and Claude exchanged icy stares before Claude smiled ominously, and closed the door behind him quietly.

-

Alois, staring blankly into his cup of hot chocolate, had finally calmed down enough to move around. Hannah had taken him into his room and prepared a cup of hot chocolate with marshmallows, just how the boy liked it. Somehow, Alois had not really noticed this detail yet. Hannah really wanted the best for him, yet, he couldn't see it, through his plea for the attention of Claude.

Alois cared so much, but all of his care was directed towards only one individual, rather than spread out as it should be. This led him astray, hurting those around him who genuinely did care. He never realizes how much harm he caused until too late, and his pride would **not** be soiled by apologizing a day late. This tells you that Alois has a twisted, irrational, almost scary sense of pride. He will grovel at someone's feet one day, but try to kill them the next; this is not out of spite, oh no, it is because he is scared. Scared of what will happen if he does not continue on this way.

After all, he is only a soul to be taken one day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SORRY FOR THE DELAY i'm depressed haha


End file.
